One of my troublesome 3-year-olds has started calling me "okaasan." Yes, this IS right before she grabs my tits.
1. Your mom is outside the classroom, staring daggers at me through the plate glass window. If you cannot tell which of us gave birth to you, please refer to the following checklist:
Does the woman have a mullet?
Is the woman Japanese?
Does the woman bear a strong resemblance to an angry hedgehog?
If you have checked "yes" to ay of these questions, congratulations! I am not your mom!
2. Dude, your twin sister doesn't have the same maternal identity issues.
3. ...okay, don't stop, it's cute.
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