Reading a Thanksgiving story aloud to kids under the age of ten has a few unexpected bonuses. Names have been changed to protect the generally innocent.
GTA: *pointing to pictures in book* Where's the turkey?
GAGGLE OF CHILDREN (GAC): There! There! Turkey! *assorted turkey noises*
GT: Great job! Where's the...corn?
GAC: CORNCORNCORNCORNCORN!!!!
Japanese children love corn. Actually, all of Japan loves corn to a frightening degree, but let's not get into that right now.
GTA: Wow, good job, everyone! Okay...Ken, can you find another food in this picture?
Ken studies the picture solemnly for a minute, before breaking out into a wicked grin. He points to something on the page.
KEN: BABY!
Sure enough, he's touching a smiling baby, who was sitting innocently at the table and totally unaware that it was on the menu.
GTA: What? Babies aren't food!
KEN: Haha, baby!
GTA: Okay, everyone, repeat after me: babies aren't food.
GAC: BABIES AREN'T FOOD!!!!
I'm a good influence, after all.
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